Soulmate Test

Do you believe in soulmates, and what are you looking for in one?

7 min · Free · No account

Soulmate Test: Two strangers in a bookshop on a rainy afternoon, one passing a dark hardback to the other, an eTestor notebook under one arm

Are soulmates real?

No study can show that one particular person was made for you. What research can measure is the belief, and it changes how people date. C. Raymond Knee (1998) separated two beliefs: destiny, that two people are either meant for each other or not, and growth, that good relationships are built through effort. In his study, destiny believers' early satisfaction predicted more strongly how long a relationship lasted, while growth believers dealt with problems in ways that kept the relationship going. This soulmate test shows where you stand on both.

About this test

A soulmate quiz about you, not about a partner. It scores two beliefs about love, Destiny (the right person is out there and you can tell early) and Growth (a good relationship is built by working through problems), and matches you to one of four kinds of soulmate believer: the Destiny Seeker, the Soulmate Builder, the Devoted Romantic or the Open Skeptic. It also scores what you look for in a partner: Warmth & trust, Passion & energy, and Status & security. It works whether you are single, dating or in a long relationship.

What you'll discover

Destiny belief
How strongly you believe partners are either meant for each other or not, and that you can tell early.
Growth belief
How strongly you believe a good relationship is built through effort and working out differences.
Warmth & trust
How much you look for kindness, support and honesty in a partner.
Passion & energy
How much you look for attraction, energy and adventure in a partner.
Status & security
How much you look for income, ambition and a settled life in a partner.

Understanding the Soulmate Test

This soulmate test gives you 45 statements, nine for each of five scales, and takes about 7 minutes. Your soulmate type is free when you finish. The full report shows all five scores: how strongly you hold each belief and what you look for in a partner. It can't tell you who your soulmate is or whether you've already met them, and no test can. It can tell you what you expect a soulmate to be, which shapes who you choose and how long you stay.

The two beliefs come from research on implicit theories of relationships. Knee found that belief in destiny went with avoiding relationship problems and with taking more responsibility for ending a relationship, while belief in growth went with a long-term approach to dating (Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 1998, doi:10.1037/0022-3514.74.2.360). Renae Franiuk and colleagues called the same split a soulmate theory and a work-it-out theory. In 527 college students, the feeling that a partner was ideal predicted satisfaction and how long the relationship lasted more strongly for soulmate theorists, and people's theories were highly stable over about eight months (Personal Relationships, 2002, doi:10.1111/1475-6811.09401). Knee measured the two beliefs separately, so you can hold both, or neither. The four types are those four combinations, and the names are ours.

The three partner scales follow Garth Fletcher and colleagues, who found that people's ideal partner comes down to three things: warmth and trustworthiness, vitality and attractiveness, and status and resources. The closer someone's current partner and relationship came to their ideals, the more positively they rated the relationship (Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 1999, doi:10.1037/0022-3514.76.1.72). We think the most useful part of the result is the pair of beliefs, because in Knee's study they went with how people responded when a relationship got hard. A soulmate quiz that names your soulmate's initial or birth date is guessing; we don't do that.

Where the Soulmate Test comes from

C. Raymond Knee introduced implicit theories of relationships in 1998: destiny belief (partners are either meant for each other or not) and growth belief (successful relationships are cultivated), measured as two separate beliefs. Franiuk, Cohen and Pomerantz (2002) described a similar split as soulmate and work-it-out theories. The partner scales follow the three ideal-partner factors found by Fletcher, Simpson, Thomas and Giles (1999): warmth-trustworthiness, vitality-attractiveness and status-resources.

How the Soulmate Test is scored

Five scores of nine statements each, two of them reverse-worded per scale. Your type comes from the two belief scales, each split at its midpoint: high destiny and low growth is the Destiny Seeker, the reverse is the Soulmate Builder, both high is the Devoted Romantic and both low is the Open Skeptic. The type names are eTestor's, and the statements are eTestor's own rather than the published scales' items, so the scores have not been checked against Knee's or Fletcher's questionnaires. The test describes beliefs and preferences; it cannot identify a soulmate or predict meeting one.

Based on a published, peer-reviewed model

Knee, C. R. (1998). Implicit theories of relationships: Assessment and prediction of romantic relationship initiation, coping, and longevity. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 74(2), 360–370.

Questions people ask

Is the soulmate test free?

Yes. The test and your soulmate type are free, with no account needed: just your email at the end. Every score, the written analysis and the certificate are in the full report: $1.99$2.41 in the first 30 minutes after you finish, $3.99$4.83 after that, or included in eTestor Unlimited.

How do you know if someone is your soulmate?

There is no sign that proves it. Research suggests the feeling depends partly on what you already believe: for people who believe in soulmates, the sense that a partner is ideal predicted how satisfied they were and how long the relationship lasted more strongly than for people who believe in working things out (Franiuk and colleagues, 2002). A more practical check is what happens after your first serious disagreement.

Can this test tell me who my soulmate is or when I'll meet them?

No. Nothing can, including quizzes that use your name, initials or date of birth. This test tells you what you believe about soulmates and what you look for in a partner, which helps you notice why some people feel right to you and others don't.

Is it bad to believe in soulmates?

Not in itself. In Knee's 1998 study, for people who believed in destiny, how satisfied they felt at the start was a stronger guide to how long the relationship lasted. The risk showed up when problems came, where destiny belief went with avoiding them. Growth belief is measured separately, so you can believe in the right person and in working at it. That combination is the Devoted Romantic.

Is the soulmate test the same as a compatibility test?

No. This test is about you alone: your beliefs about love and what you want in a partner. A compatibility test looks at two people, such as whether you share values and life plans and how you handle arguments. If you're in a relationship, our compatibility test for couples covers that.